I feel like there has been this increase of pressure in society when it comes to always being on top of everything, doing the absolute most at the exact time it’s needed, and being present at everything you possibly can. I think we’ve all fallen victim to this idea. There is a certain type of peace you achieve in life when you sit back and enjoy things at a slower pace. You do not need to be always living a life that is desirable through the screen.

According to Cambridge Dictionary, FOMO is an informal abbreviation and slang for ‘Fear of Missing Out’. It is defined as ‘a worried feeling that you may miss exciting events that other people are going to, especially caused by things you see on social media’.

FOMO is such an interesting concept in my opinion. We live in a society where things are constantly happening. It’s so heavily connected to social media now more than ever because we have endless outlets that allow us to see what other people are doing when we might not be doing anything at all. I’ve spent hours before scrolling through my Instagram or my Snapchat seeing everyone I know out at a certain party or bar having the ‘time of their lives’ while I sit in my bed, cozied up with a book in my jammies.

FOMO is such a silly little thing. I used to get it all the time and feel like I was such a loser for having no plans while everyone around me had more plans than they had time for. What nobody ever wants to talk about is that we all get FOMO. Nobody is what they seem on social media. It might not be the case for the many influencers and celebrities like Alix Earle, but it for sure is for the girl who sits next to you in your history class.

Opposite of FOMO, the ‘Joy of Missing Out’ is called JOMO.

Listen, I’m a big advocate for putting yourself out there and making memories. I love spontaneous fun and plans that end up being nights you remember for the rest of our life. But believing in that doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy the art of doing less.

I think there is some sort of phenomenon that happens when we give in to the fear of missing out. We become so addicted with being ‘in the know’, doing things that everyone else is doing, and all of the meaningless busyness. I feel like the amount of pressure we put on ourselves on top of all the societal pressure makes us believe we need to compare our lives to our peers, and force experiences.

I think in a way, FOMO is good. Being afraid to miss out on experiences can be a good thing in the way that it encourages you to step out of your comfort zone. There have been cases in my life recently where I have experience this whole thing and felt like if I didn’t do something I would regret it and ultimately feel even more left out than usual. I think it kinda requires perspective when having FOMO about certain things.

On the flip side, I’m one of those people who thrives and embraces this idea of JOMO. I wasn’t always that way, but recently I have realized how much more interesting life is with a perspective change. I feel like somewhat dismissing FOMO in my life has allowed me to see things in a different light. Sure I might not be ‘in the know’ about the most recent drama or events, and I’m definitely not the girl to ask about upcoming weekend plans, but life’s a lot more peaceful.

Instead of focusing on how maybe I’m missing out on the traditional ‘college experience’ by not going out to parties as much, I’ve realized I’m using my time in a much more enriching way for myself. I do things with more intention and less focus on how it might look on my Instagram. I don’t align my plans with the norms of my peers, and I don’t regret as much as I used to.

There’s a lot of things in life that change when you alter your perspective on it. FOMO is one of them. It’s not about what you’re looking at, it’s more about how you look at it.

Live life with intent, not jealousy.

xoxo,

Caroline